Sunday, February 3, 2013

February 3, 2013


Such a quiet morning.  Pale blue sky streaked with gray and white, not even a breeze.  The birds are still asleep.  The truck that brings the paper is the loudest thing I've heard so far.  Even inside, no heater, no refrigerator, but the ever-present hum of the computer is still with us, and keys tapping.  Cats are quiet, at least the striped one is, as he makes his morning rounds of the yard.  It's unusual for it to be so very quiet and such a contrast to the last couple of days. 

Saw my niece's new baby yesterday, a sweet little Claire, and had forgotten how warm and snuggly babies are, and so small!  When your children are all grown, it's hard to remember they were once so small and so vulnerable!  You think you remember, until you are confronted with a real baby, and you realize that they are a lot smaller than you recall, still, my babies were all rather . . . large, nine pounds or over and so maybe they weren't quite so . . .delicate as Claire looks.  But she's a bright one, noticing everything, especially the ceiling fan, but for only seconds at a time, too many things to notice in a room full of people.   Fletcher came in from helping his grandfather fix Winonah's car, the battery needed replacing, and said "I'm filthy, I need a shower" and he was pretty dirty, and he does love their new big shower.  He sang and talked to himself and made laser sounds all through it and came out all clean and tidy.  So full of energy that you would like to be an energy vampire and steal a little as he would never notice! 

Today is the day for the blessing, and though I do not see them at the moment, I know the sparrows are out there, singing, and that I will hear them again. 

The Beautiful, Striped Sparrow 

In the afternoons,
  in the almost empty fields,
     I hum the hymns
        I used to sing 

in church.
  They could not tame me,
     so they would not keep me,
        alas, 

and how that feels,
  the weight of it,
      I will not tell
         any of you, 

not ever.
  Still, as they promised,
     God, once he is in your heart,
         is everywhere -- 

so even here
  among the weeds
     and the brisk trees.
         How long does it take 

to hum a hymn?  Strolling
   one or two acres
      of the sweetness
         of the world, 

not counting
  a lapse, now and again,
     of sheer emptiness.
        Once a deer 

stood quietly at my side.
  And sometimes the wind
      has touched my cheek
         like a spirit. 

Am I lonely?
   The beautiful, striped sparrow,
       serenely, on the tallest weed in his kingdom,
          also sings without words. 

Mary Oliver 

Mary Oliver is not the only poet to have church outside of church, Emily Dickinson, e. e. cummings, also wrote poems about worshiping in the outdoors.  Perhaps it's the wildness that appeals to them, perhaps they just feel closer to God among nature.  I only know that if God is everywhere I don't think it matters where you worship, that there is enough grace pouring down on us for us to be thankful anywhere in any season.  When reminded by new babies that grace comes to us in so many ways, you can pray anywhere, and every thought you have of gratitude and praise is a prayer, not confined to place or day or time, but any time and anywhere you lift up your heart in joy or sorrow or gratitude, that is a place of worship. 

Even in the quiet this morning, the sky evening out to a pale clouded blue, there is grace in seeing the new life budding among the maple branches, and song in the quiet, echoes of all the birds that have come and will come to bring us pleasure.  Make your prayer anywhere, and give worship any time you can, Sundays, or any other moment.

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